All By Myself

This morning just started off bad. I was tired from last night and my alarm never went off to wake me up for my running group. I woke up around 7:15 and was so upset because I knew they'd already be on the road (we leave at 7am sharp!) and there was no hope of me getting to the Runtex off Lake Austin Blvd. in time to catch up with them.

So I drug out my Nike + iPod system, filled up my water bottles, got my workout playlist all ready to go and proceeded to run the 9 miles my group was running together all by myself. I wasn't too optimistic about this run...I've never done 9 miles before...and I really haven't done anything over 7 all by myself. But I hit the road, ran three minutes, walked one minute, all the way up Wells Branch to 35, then back down Wells Branch to MoPac, and then home. It ended up being about 8.79 miles and I did have to stop and walk the last quarter mile or so home...but I did it! I was shocked, honestly, that my body can run 9 miles in about an hour and a half (And that I can burn 989 calories...thats almost a days worth!!)

I admit, I did get a bit pessimistic on the way home when I was hurting. 26 miles is SO much longer than 9. And I started thinking If I'm hurting this much now, how on EARTH will I ever be able to do 26 miles? But I think that's just it...EARTH has nothing to do with it. Heaven and grace and GOD have everything to do with it. Philippians 4:13 says "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." That says all things. Not just some things. That means I can run 26 miles through Christ. And I can witness to people through Christ (even when I'm scared). And I can make it through the rest of college through Christ. That gives me such great hope and such great joy!

I've been struggling so much with contentment lately. Not that my life isn't wonderful...I have an amazing husband, family, puppy, church, and God. But my mind is having trouble living in the moment. I catch myself thinking all the time, Oh, I can't wait until we can move out of this tiny apartment! or I really wish I was done with school and could start my REAL job now...then my life would really begin. or I can't wait until Greg and I are financially able to have kids...and I remember that before we were married I couldn't wait for the wedding, and before we were engaged I was dying to be his "fiancee." I just want to be content with the now...and I'm struggling and battling with myself to be here. To be in this moment and no where else. And that is much easier said than done!

I am all over the place tonight. I blame it on memorizing 5 pages front and back (literally, no exaggerating here!) for my Children's Lit test on Monday. I'm only on page 3. But I think I'm done for the night...when your head starts spinning and the definition that you've just written down five times in order to make yourself memorize it really isn't making sense anymore, it's time to quit.

Greg is going out of town tomorrow and I'm really going to miss him. At least he is only gone until Thursday (Grey's Anatomy season premier night!) and then I get to have him back at home ;) Since I'm such a chicken, I'm staying with my mom for the week. Didn't you know? Whenever I'm home alone by myself I hear things. Creepy things. Like people walking up the stairs (that we don't have) or people trying to get into my apartment to kidnap me. And of course the double locks we have on our door just won't do. So off to mommy and daddy's house it is ;)

Before I leave, I have a video to share of the cutest puppy in the entire world. It makes me smile :)

I hope that made you smile!

Don't let the bed bugs bite!